Porn: The untold effects of ‘Neuro-Subjugation’

Porn: The untold effects of  ‘Neuro- Subjugation’ aka Addiction

(fiction – although the citations and the sources are non-fiction)

“As I posted in a previous blog (Dirty Secret of Nasty Middle Aged Men) before much of a man’s dysfunction problems are psychological.”  My Doctor continued her inquiry as she finished the physical part of my examination.  I stressed about ‘function’ problems.  

As she removed the elbow length rubber gloves, the Doctor said,” stress, poor sleep and/or bad diet also contribute to a man’s mood, most men’s sex drive is determined by their self esteem…financial problems or poor relationship skills can also cause anxiety, anger and disassociation.”

I said, “Doctor, that’s the second time you brought up poor relationship skills” as I quickly pulled up my pants.  I asked “What are you getting at?”  I felt like I had been violated… (like a pervert got off on me) I had no idea a Doctor could stick a finger so far up in you.  

The Doctor asked me some more questions with a blank clinical look that could only be considered professional although the subject matter was about to get lewd and nasty. 

The Doctor prefaced her questions with the disclaimer; “If you do not feel comfortable answering some of my questions just say so…I will be glad to make a referral.”  I said, “OK, go ahead, ask anything.”  “How much time do you spend looking at porn?” “Not looking her in the eye (this woman Doctor was good looking and I stepped into a trap in a half when I said ask anything) I said “about an hour a week, why?”  The Doctor, noticing my discomfort did not let up.

“Recent studies at the University of Kansas and other institutions by noted authorities on sex have determined that exposure to pornography does effect a man’s sexual performance with his partner.  In cases where a man has no steady partner pornography is the underlying cause of failed relationships or even the abandoning of relationships” said the Doctor in a soft pity-filled voice.

  

“What are you getting at Doctor?”  I was not happy with the implications.  “You might want to see a psychiatrist to pursue the issue since physically, you are in very good shape.  

Clinical studies have determined prolonged and constant exposure to porn will affect the brain. 

If something is not working right it starts with your mind, not with your penis.”  So I considered what the Doctor said and saw a psychiatrist who had some very interesting things to say regarding my ‘function’. 

I should have kept this to myself and got more into reading academic works and other boring material.  But I shared this with a ‘friend’ who brought the very subject of porn up to me several times due to her ‘disdain’ at the level of ‘graphic material’ in the blog.  So I shared with Zaydie (an alias for a woman friend) what the Doctor said and she brought up everything I blogged about and called me a ‘hypocrite’ among other no so nice things and elaborated on the topic.

“Yeah RJ, I read the links you leave at the end of the blogs and found the Kerner article posted by Dr. Sanjay Gupta on CNN’s website.  Kerner blames the problem on thousands of internet porn sites most of which I bet you been on RJ, the articles also proves, quoting the article ‘that porn damages men’s physical and emotional interest in sex on a very fundamental neurological level.’” 

“You’re a mess, as is with most men, you look at women like freaks, like low-lifes made only ‘to get you off’…I can help you, but your attitude and your thinking better change.”  My attitude started to change immediately.  Fear does that.

“Look Zaydie, please don’t tell anyone about what the shrink said but I would appreciate your help.”  Zaydie looked at me like I was some sort of object (I got very nervous) then she said, “look RJ, when we go into the ‘workout phase’ you do everything I say or it will wreck our relationship and you better tell me everything your doing and not doing regarding porn…remember, the more you see of that porn crap the less you’ll see of me – got it!”  I said, “Understood, clearly understood.”

As the week passed I thought about other guys going through this very problem.  I took time to read other articles from academic medical journals, The Archives of Sexual Behavior and laboratory research.  I was really scared about the status of being as ‘masculine as I used to be’ because I am someone who is totally attracted to, and desire to be attractive to women.

Being absolutely turned on by even the smile of some women I thought about porn again when I read an article by By Davy Rothbart in New York Magazine titled “He’s Just Not That Into Anyone.”  I thought about the warnings by preachers and right wing nut jobs.

 

To quote the article, “For decades, hand-wringers have warned of a porn epidemic that would tear the nation’s moral fabric asunder. But if online porn has spread a sickness, it’s one that’s less like Ebola and more like a midwinter cold. The initial symptom for a lot of guys who frequently find themselves bookmarking their favorite illicit clips appears to be a waning desire for their partners.

Jonas*, a 34-year-old ad exec, told me, “I get on SpankWire or X Videos—you could carve ice sculptures with my dick. I take a girl home from the bar, though, and I’ll be up for a minute while she’s going down on me, but once I put a condom on and we start going at it, it’s like the Challenger exploded—all the flags are at half-mast.”

I thought about what my psychiatrist said I should do as ‘a therapeutic’ way to deal with the ‘mind warp’ that needed to be ‘straightened out’.  I thought about Lucky’s friend, and how he got into ‘therapy’, he went kind of nuts but is now very involved in Church.  He is also terminally pussy whipped but likes his life now.  I thought about this as Zaydie proceeded with our ‘session’. (Zaydie is a registered sex surrogate…and more)

  

When your wrists are bound to a rope secured to a 18^th century wood beam running the length of the hay loft in a feed barn and your wearing only a jockstrap, your incredibly vulnerable, your really only thinking of getting loose.

 You really become anxious until the sting of a whip or whatever she used causes you to gasp for air through the gag and then you hear, “LOOK AT ME…AND ONLY AT ME!  Then you realize Therapy isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

Contrition, be it psychological or spiritual is usually very painful.

RJ

http://thehappeningz.blogspot.com/2009/03/kink-whips-ballgags-and-sex-toys.html

http://nymag.com/news/features/70976/

http://thehappeningz.blogspot.com/2011/12/dirty-secret-of-nasty-middle-aged-men.html

http://nymag.com/nymetro/nightlife/sex/columns/nakedcity/n_8542/, 

http://www.lemondrop.com/2009/05/06/the-mystery-behind-sex-surrogacy/